This particular conversation was between some girls who did not appear to be getting along very well. As the conversation continued to become more and more tense, one of the girls said “I’m not trying to be rude but . . .” and then went on to say some things that were extremely rude. Her tone of voice, her body language, and the words she used, all indicated that she was indeed being rude and that she both knew she was rude and meant to be rude. Her “I’m not trying to be rude...” introduction was just a ploy to be able to say whatever mean thing she wanted while pretending to be nice.
Though this particular incident involved teens, I have heard similar things among adults. Far too often starting a sentence with “I’m not trying to be rude but . . .” is just a thinly disguised way to be rude and get away with it. While sometimes it might not be intentional, most often it is. Such rudeness, thinly disguised as politeness, fools no one and does not accomplish anything positive.
The world may treat each other that way, but we Christians should aspire to higher standards. We Christians should aspire to treat each other with dignity and respect as brothers and sisters in the family of God. If we do not mean to be rude, then we should not BE rude. If we realize we are being rude, we should stop mid-sentence and apologize. After all, none of us are perfect. What we cannot do is just continue to be rude thinking that we are fooling others into believing that we are polite.
Rudeness will not gain us friends nor bring honor to the Savior. As Christians, we should strive to be friendly (Proverbs 18:24) and we should seek to bring honor to the Savior in all that we say and do (Colossians 3:17). This gives us all something to think about the next time we are having a tense conversation with someone else and are tempted to be rude while pretending to be polite.
For more devotionals like this one, consider Touching the Footprints of Jesus.
May we all have a conversational attitude that is "full of grace." I don't mean to be rude... so I won't be. Thanks for this word today.
ReplyDeleteI like this.
ReplyDeletethank you, that was really good
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you. I remember when I was in high school and my mom pointed this out and it has stuck with me ever since. Thanks for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteI like this.
ReplyDeletevery good thoughts here. We all need to stop and think.
ReplyDeleteHi Terry! I don't mean to be rude but...
ReplyDeleteJust kidding!:)
Great article. Nicely put.
ReplyDeleteoops! Open mouth insert foot.
ReplyDeleteI like this.
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, yes. Needed that insight and teaching. Thanks.
ReplyDelete"I'm saying this out of love..." is one of my favorites. Whenever I hear that I reach for my helmet, 'cause I know I'm about to get pounded.
ReplyDeleteVery good!! I have often thought the same thing. Thanks for putting it into words.
ReplyDeleteExactly! I think we have all been there a time or two and this was well said and tastefully put! Every now and then we all need a good NUDGE from God :)
ReplyDeleteI guess alot of people need help with communication lessons!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Terry. Some of the most hurtful comments I've received have been prefaced like this (or, in my case, "No offense, but..."), & I'm sure my experience isn't unusual.
ReplyDelete