Showing posts with label hurt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hurt. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Broken Beyond Healing

Proverbs 29:1 - He who is often reproved, yet stiffens his neck, will suddenly be broken beyond healing.

The mother sat in my office with her head hung low. I could barely hear her voice as she shared her story with me. Her son, who had always had a strong rebellious streak, had finally done something bad enough to land him in jail. As a result, he had lost the only good job he had ever had. He had lost custody of his daughter, the one bright spot in his life. His girlfriend was refusing to answer his calls or cooperate with his lawyer to get him out of jail. The mother sobbed "His whole life is ruined and there is no way to fix it."

Though I wish I could have offered some great words of advice that would make all that mother's pain go away, there was little I could do but listen and pray. I had known her son for years. More than once I had deep conversations with him about his life and where it was headed. He was not interested in what some "Bible thumping preacher" had to say. He was not interested in what his mother had to say. He was not interested in what teachers at school had to say. He was going to do what he wanted, when he wanted and how he wanted. And that attitude landed him in jail, jobless, alone and broken.

Several years have passed since that conversation. To the best of my knowledge, he is back in jail again. Still broken, still stubborn, still rebelling against all authority. No amount of rehabilitation, counseling or punitive action seem to impact him. From a human perspective, he is broken beyond healing.

The only thing that can turn his life around would be for him to humble himself before almighty God, repent of his sins and place all his hope on Christ alone. But so far, he does not seem interested in that road to healing. So he struggles on, angry with his situation, blaming others, hating those who he perceives as the cause of his problem. Broken beyond healing.

Though this young man's situation is probably more extreme than most, he represents so many in our culture who are under the sway of the spirit of rebellion. That spirit of rebellion has caused them so much pain but they do not seem capable of turning loose of it. Until they do, they will remain broken beyond healing.

Lord, reveal Yourself in a powerful way to those under the sway of a spirit of rebellion. Bind that spirit and replace it with the overwhelming presence of Your Holy Spirit. Show them healing that only comes in the name of Christ through faith and repentance. Amen.

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Dr. Terry W. Dorsett has been a pastor, church planter, denominational leader and author in New England for more than 20 years. He is a happy husband, a proud father and adoring grandfather. He is a cancer survivor and believes that God works powerfully through times of suffering. He has written a book about the spirit of offense that prevails in our current society. You can find all of his books at:

Monday, March 7, 2016

Driftwood: Sea Trash Becomes Amazing Monument

Romans 8:28 - And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

A few weeks ago I spent a week at a conference. The conference center we met at was on ocean. Each afternoon when our session would end, I took a long walk on the beach. Each day as I walked I would pass a piece of driftwood that had been made smooth by the waves and now was stood in the sand beside the ocean in an amazing display of beauty. One day it occurred to me that this piece of wood, which was once rough and nothing more than “sea trash” now stood like a monument to the stately beauty of the ocean’s power to smooth away rough edges.

As I reflected on the things of God while I continued to walk, I realized that this driftwood is a lot like our own lives. We all have our rough edges. We all have aspects of our lives that are less attractive. We may at times feel like trash battered about by the waves of this world. But God has a way of using the waves that batter against our lives to smooth out our rough edges. He has a way of making what seems bad into something that is good. God’s ways are often mysterious but when we submit to them, we become monuments to His power.


Whatever we are facing in our lives, we must trust the Lord to see us through. We must trust that our rough edges are being removed and we are becoming better, for the glory of His name.

Lord, help us learn to trust You to make us monuments to Your own glory. Amen.

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Dr. Terry W. Dorsett has been a pastor, church planter, denominational leader and author in New England for more than 20 years. He is a happy husband, a proud father and adoring grandfather. He is a cancer survivor and believes that God works powerfully through times of suffering. He has written a book about the spirit of offense that prevails in our current society. You can find all of his books at:

Friday, November 21, 2014

Don't Despair - God Has a Plan

Psalm 18:1-3 - I love You, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my mountain where I seek refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I was saved from my enemies.

All of us could make a list of troubles and difficulties we have experienced in life. We could also give testimony of ways in which God was our refuge in those difficult times. Like David, we can attest that the Lord is worthy to be praised.

But if we keep reading Psalm 18, we see the depths of despair that David went through before the Lord delivered him. David talked about ropes of death wrapped around him and snares of death confronting him. Both of those phrases are powerful visual images of how bad David’s situation was. Most of our problems do not take us to the edge of death and back. But David knew such deep turmoil in his soul because of the range of troubles that he had been through. Perhaps that is why his love for God shone so brightly.

When we go through difficult times we are often tempted to be angry at God for letting us down. According to verse 5, David went through a living hell, yet he did not become bitter or angry. Instead he said God’s way was perfect and that God would make his way perfect too. Difficulties make us bitter or they make us better. If we choose faith in God, we find the strength to go down the path of betterment instead of bitterness.

Though we do not always understand God's plan for our lives, we can rest in the assurance that God does indeed have a plan. God's ways are perfect, and as we learn to love Him more, He can make our ways perfect too. Regardless of what we are facing today, let us choose the path of faith and give praise to a God who has all things under control.

Lord, help the difficulties of our lives make us better, not bitter. Amen.


This post is an excerpt from the book, The Heavenly Mundane: Daily Devotions from Ordinary Experiences. Filled with stories of how God spoke in big ways through small events, the book will encourage people to look for God in the mundane things of life. Great for both personal use and to give as a gift to friend, either the print version or the e-book version may be purchased at this link:

Thursday, September 18, 2014

When Cravings Collide

James 4:1-3 - What is the source of wars and fights among you? Don’t they come from the cravings that are at war within you? You desire and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and don’t receive because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your evil desires.

I started in ministry when I was only 18 years old. I have served as a children’s minister in a large church, a youth minister in a medium sized church, and as pastor of both small and medium sized congregations. In my many years in these various capacities, I have seen many families that were torn apart by internal struggles. Though they loved each other, they just could not overcome their negative feelings toward one another. Some families broke apart completely, and no longer have any connections. Other families remain connected, but tension lies just under the surface, ready to erupt at any moment. I have often wondered why people who love each other have so many struggles with each other.

James 4:1 answers the question of why we have struggles and conflict with other people in our lives. This verse identifies the root of these conflicts as the cravings that are inside all of us.

What do we crave? We crave acceptance. We crave love. We crave control. We crave power. We crave recognition. We crave security. We crave both connection and independence, which makes us feel conflicted internally. Some of these cravings are normal and may not lead to conflict with others. But some of these cravings will cause conflict because the other people in our lives crave different things, or sometimes the same things but in different ways.

While there should always be enough love to go around for all members of the family, it is impossible for everyone in the family to be in control. While every member of the family should be accepted for who they are, not everyone in the family will have equal power or independence. When we forget this important truth and our cravings collide with the cravings of others, the result is always conflict.

What is the solution? For non-Christian families, I am not sure there is a great solution. They will just have to negotiate the situation the best they can and hope it works out. But for Christian families, the solution is to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Jesus (Matthew16:24-27). As Christians, our goal should not be our own power, our own control, or our own agenda. Our goal should be to lift up Jesus in every area of our lives. That can be hard in the midst of a heated discussion with those we love. But it is the only path to lasting happiness and peace. Any other path will lead to constant conflict with those we love.

The next time our cravings begin to collide with the cravings of someone else, we should take a deep breath and ask ourselves what response would glorify the Lord. Then, as hard as it may be, we should choose that response. Though it might not result in instant gratification, it will produce long term healthy results. After all, we will be part of our family for the rest of our lives. A future without constant conflict sure sounds better than one with constant conflict.

Lord, help us not to create conflict with others because we allow our own sinful desires to rule us. Amen.


This post is an excerpt from the book, The Heavenly Mundane: Daily Devotions from Ordinary Experiences. Filled with stories of how God spoke in big ways through small events, the book will encourage people to look for God in the mundane things of life. Great for both personal use and to give as a gift to friend, either the print version or the e-book version may be purchased at this link:

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Is God Good?

Dr. David Jeremiah is a well known evangelical pastor from California. Unlike many television preachers who preach for the cameras and the fame that comes with those cameras, Dr. Jeremiah's sermons are designed for his local church. The television audience just gets to tune in to see and hear his Bible based sermons aimed at his local church. I appreciate the fact that his sermons are Bible based and not the "send me your seed money and God will bless you" type.

I was fascinated by a particular sermon Dr. Jeremiah preached the other day. I watched it on television. It was about why disasters come into our lives if God is such a loving, powerful and good God. Dr. Jeremiah gave a number of good reasons, and it might be worth the time to look him up on the Internet and watch that sermon. The whole sermon was good, but the part that captured my attention the most was when Dr. Jeremiah asked: "Why would a person who refuses to worship God when he is healthy think God owes him a miracle when he is sick? Why should we appeal to a God we refuse to acknowledge when we are wealthy when we suddenly find ourselves in poverty? Why would we look for God's protection in times of disaster when we have not looked to Him in thanksgiving when things went well."

I thought those were great questions. I have been in the ministry since 1988 and in all of those years I have heard many unchurched people complain about how the Lord did not do for them what they wanted Him to do. They talk about some problem or struggle they experienced and how they prayed and asked God for a miracle, but God did not deliver in the way they asked. They conclude that since God did not answer their prayer the way they wanted Him to, He either does not exist or is not worthy of their worship. Their conclusion is based on a faulty premise, that God "owes" us something just because we ask.

I am a good parent, but I do not give my children everything they ask for. Sometimes it is because they are not yet ready for it. Sometimes it is because they do not deserve it. Sometimes it is because I have something better in mind. Though my children may not like my response, my response does not make me a bad parent, in fact, it reinforces just how good of a parent I am because I do what it best for my children even when they do not like it. Likewise, God is good. But His goodness does not obligate Him to give everyone what ever they ask for.

Think about it from this perspective, everything we get from God is a gift. The salvation that God made available to us through His Son Jesus Christ leaves us as debtors to Him. It is a debt we can never repay no matter how many good deeds we do. So even if we are the best Christian possible, God will never owe us a favor. How much less does God owe us if we are Christians who are not walking with Him? How much less does God owe us if we are not even Christians? A non-Christian who gets ONE prayer answered in their entire life should realize the great gift it is, from a God who owes them absolutely nothing.

This may not make us feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but good parents know when to make us feel warm and fuzzy and when to let us experience the hard knocks of life. God is the best parent of all. Let us look to Him with gratitude for anything He gives us. Let us thank Him in good times. Let us praise Him in times of Health. Let us honor Him in times of prosperity. Then when bad times come, let us remember that He owes us nothing, but if He chooses to give us something anyway, then it is an extra gift of grace that should indeed make us feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Monday, January 14, 2013

It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better

When I was a teenager, I remember someone saying, “It will get worse before it gets better.” At the time I thought it was a terrible thing to say and wondered what kind of person says such things to a young person. In retrospect, I think the person was just trying to be realistic, though perhaps a bit negative, about life. For many people, though not for all people, things will indeed get worse before it gets better. I wish that was not true, but wishful thinking does not change reality.

There are many reasons why things get worse for some people before they get better, but I only want to focus on one reason in this post. That reason is the deceptive web that sin plays in our lives. We often become involved in sinful behavior. At first it seems like we are getting away with it. But eventually we begin to feel the pain of our bad choices. At first, we think we can handle the consequences. But like a snowball rolling down a hill, sin grows and grows until it consumes our lives. Suddenly, there comes a point when we realize it has gotten out of control and the pain it has caused us can no longer be ignored. We have hit the bottom. (Someone reading this right now who is going through a hard time is thinking to themselves, "But I have been trying to live right and do right." If that is true, then this post does not apply to you. But the rest of us need to keep reading.)

In those moments when we realize we have hit bottom, we tend to be more open to understanding the truth of the gospel. That is when we tend to show up at church because the deep pain that is the result of sinful actions threatens to destroy our lives and we are looking for hope. It is in that moment of crisis that we need someone to reach out to us and offer a way out of pain through faith in Jesus Christ. But the church often rejects people who are on the bottom because of their behavior just when they need Christians the most. It is easy for biblically minded Christians to forget to express the love of God while also exposing sin for what it is. Churches that can find the right balance between expressing love and pointing out how much sin hurts will connect well with the postmodern people who now make up the majority of our society.

Postmodern adults who live in a culture of brokenness are looking for something that can ease their pain. Churches can help people understand the hurt that is caused by bad choices. People are not interested in hearing about a fairy-tale world where people just say a prayer and all their problems go away. They know that world does not exist. Instead they need to hear about our own spiritual journey with all its bumps, setbacks, troubles, and hardships. They need to hear about the times we doubted and were afraid. They also need to hear that we received the strength we needed from our faith to keep going despite our troubles. They need to know there is hope to be found through faith in Jesus Christ.

The day of fifteen-minute feel-good devotionals that masquerade as sermons is over, if we want to have real impact on our culture. In our postmodern culture, church leaders should better plan for lengthy discussions that will not have simple conclusions or easy answers. That does not mean that postmodern people do not want to feel good about themselves, of course they do, everyone does. But a feel good only approach will not satisfy the deep longing postmodern adults have for answers to the complex world into which they have been thrust. Churches willing to invest the necessary time, energy, and love into the lives of young adults and journey with them through the dicult questions and experiences will find those young adults quite  interested in what churches have to say.

If churches fail to help young people deal with pain, those churches should not be surprised when the next generation looks for comfort in other places. Churches have been called to hold the keys to the kingdom of God. Too many churches have lost the keys. It is important for churches to rediscover those keys before they lose a whole generation. One of the ways churches can rediscover the keys to the kingdom and unlock spiritual truth for young people is to help them deal with the pain they have experienced in life and the evil they observe in the world around them. Fortunately, the Bible is filled with practical advice about these subjects. If churches can communicate these biblical truths in ways the next generation can understand, they will find ears eager to listen.

 
Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Does Faith in God Help or Hurt?



We have been discussing in the last few blogs (click here for a review) about what causes pain in our personal lives and in the world around us. We have concluded that though it is impossible to have a “perfect” life without any troubles or difficulties, life is better when we have a strong faith in God.

Though I think the majority of people would agree with me that life is better when faith is present, every so often I meet a person who wants to argue the point. I recall an Internet-based debate I had once with a group of spiritual skeptics from Arizona State University. They asserted that people who are religious are emotionally unhappy and mentally unhealthy because of the great sense of guilt religion unfairly places on people. They thought all this talk of sin and Satan is proof that faith is more harmful to people than helpful. I challenged their assumptions based on my own life experiences and on Scripture, but they insisted they were right. They said they had facts to prove their claim was correct. I asked them to produce their evidence. Despite their adamant insistence, they were unable to cite a single scientific study or survey that backed up their outrageous claim that faith hurts instead of helps. Most of the arguments those students made came from Christopher Hitchens’ book, God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything. Hitchens has become a hero to many young people who want to blame God for all the pain in their own lives and in the world around them. Since those ASU students had no facts to support their claim that faith hurts instead of helps, I decided to do my own research on the subject. I was amazed at how much evidence exists to verify that faith is a positive influence in our lives.

Consider this:
WebMD.com reports: People who attend religious services, or who feel they are spiritual, experience lower levels of depression and anxiety; display signs of better health, such as lower blood pressure and fewer strokes; and say they generally feel healthier.

That same website revealed that not only are religious people healthier, but they also live longer. In a study of over four thousand people, Dr. Harold G. Koenig, of Duke University Medical Center in Durham, North Carolina, reported, “People who attend religious services at least once a week are less likely to die in a given period of time than people who attend services less often.”
Dr. Michael Roizen and Dr. Mehmet Oz reported similar findings in a recent article entitled “Feel the Spirit.” In that article, the doctors reference a “study of 6,534 older Chicago residents, who said they have spiritual experiences every single day.”  The study revealed that going to church “can protect against age-related memory loss and thinking problems.” The article went on to say, “People who go to services more  than once a week have half the risk of major depression as those who attend less often.”

Researchers at Florida State University found that “regular prayer increases your concern for other people … that could help you make your part of the world a brighter, better place.” A number of other studies made similar conclusions, and a simple Google search will reveal them to anyone interested in checking out those claims on their own.
The research clearly shows that religious people are healthier and live longer, but are they actually happier? In 2009 Professor Andrew Clark, from the Paris School of Economics, and co-author Dr. Orsolya Lelkes, from the European Centre for Social Welfare Policy and Research, examined numerous surveys and scientific studies done in Europe and concluded that deeply religious people have higher levels of life satisfaction than nonreligious ones. Clark and Lelkes concluded that religion in general acts as a buer that protects people from life’s disappointments.

The connection between happiness and faith is not just true for our European friends. The highly respected Pew Research Center discovered that in America:
People who attend religious services weekly or more are happier than those who attend monthly or less; or seldom or never.

This correlation between happiness and frequency of church attendance has been a consistent finding for years. Two studies led by psychology professor Michael Inzlicht at the University of Toronto reveal that believing in God can help block anxiety and minimize stress.  In October 2010, three researchers from Princeton, New Jersey, reported:
A new analysis of more than 550,000 Gallup-Healthways Well Being Index interviews conducted over the last year and a half finds that Americans who are the most religious also have the highest levels of wellbeing.

For those who may think that the link between faith and wellbeing is just a coincidence, researchers report, “The dierence in wellbeing between the religious and nonreligious populations is highly statistically significant given the large sample size this research uses.”
The bottom line is that faith simply makes people happier. Faith can help us deal with the pain in our lives, regardless of the source of that pain. People who are deeply religious do not need a survey to tell them they are happier than their unbelieving friends. They already know this because they witness it on a regular basis. That does not mean that religious people do not have bad days or have periods of time in which they may feel depressed, but it does mean that as a general rule, they live happier lives than those who are not religious.

This may not be politically correct in today’s pluralistic culture, but it is scientifically accurate. Though some people may not like religious faith, there is simply no denying that faith improves people’s quality of life. We may all be entitled to our own opinion on the subject, but we are not entitled to our own facts. The facts are clear: religious faith makes us healthier and happier and increases longevity.
When postmodern people find themselves involved in unhealthy activities and poor lifestyle choices that lead them to significant amounts of personal pain, they need someone to show them a better way to live.

This means that churches need to find ways to gently connect sinful behaviors that cause the pain that naturally results from those behaviors. In the past, people just took the church’s word that certain actions or behaviors were sinful and tried to steer clear of those things to the best of their ability. But since postmodern people decide what truth is based on their own research and experiences, they are likely to have to learn about the consequences of sin by experiencing them personally. Though this will take time and effort, it is worth doing because the next generation is in great pain and the best way out of that pain is to find a meaningful faith in Jesus Christ.

Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Dealing With Pain

This is the final post in our series on the emotional, physical and spiritual pain each of us deal with in our lives on a regular basis. If you have missed any of those posts, you might want to go back and read them here:

1. How our own sins cause pain in our lives.
2. How the sins of others cause pain in our lives.
3. How Satan causes pain in our lives.
4. How free will is connected to pain in our lives.
5. How the fall of mankind in is connected to the pain in our lives.

While we have clearly established that much of the pain in our world is caused by sin, what are we to do about it? We know that sin really does hurt us, whether it is our sin or the sin of others. We know Satan is real and is working hard to hurt people as well. But can our faith really help?

Though some people may not want to admit it, faith really does help us find relief from pain and discover happiness and joy in our lives. In fact, our past pain can help us assist others who are going through similar types of pain. The apostle Paul talks about this in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, where he says, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort. He comforts us in all our aiction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of aiction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God (HCSB).” Paul is reminding us in this Scripture that our own pain can be used by God to comfort other people who have experienced similar pain. However, for that to happen, we have to know God and trust that He works through the painful experiences in our lives to bring about the ultimate good. When we realize that, our past pain can become a powerful ally in our efforts to help others. It is the comfort that we draw from our faith that helps us overcome pain in our lives. Those who have no faith must endure the same pain as everyone else but without the help of God. Therefore, it makes sense for us to encourage as many people as possible to find a meaningful faith in God.

Now, some skeptics would like to argue about whether faith really does help us deal with the difficulties of life. We will look at the scientific proof that faith helps us deal with the pains of life more effectively in my next post.



Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

 

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Pain and the Fall of Mankind into Sin


In the last few posts we have been discusing the issue of pain in our lives. We want to continue that disussion with this post. We have established that much of the emotional hurt we face in life has to do with the fall of mankind into sin. This whole process of the sins of one person hurting another began with Adam in Genesis 3. When Adam sinned, the perfect world God created became tainted by sin. One result of the taint of sin was natural disasters. Such disasters cause significant pain to the lives of millions of people who never even knew Adam existed.

The ripple eects of Adam’s sin continue to cause pain to people after many millennia. In the past most people were not aware of the pain that natural disasters caused around the world. Today, through the Internet, cable television, and other technological advances, the next generation has witnessed dramatic suering in the world that was not caused by the people who experienced the pain. 

The terrible tragedy of 9/11, the tsunami of 2004, and the earthquakes in Haiti in 2010 and in Japan in 2011 are but a few examples of pain the next generation has seen. They have been victims of significant pain themselves—pain they did not cause. Even when they accept the fact that some of their pain was self-inflicted, they still want to know why God did not stop the pain that others caused and why God did not stop the pain that results from natural disasters. That is why it is important to have conversations about free will. Just as we have misused our free will, others have misused their free will as well. That freedom may cost other people dearly. Adam used his free will to bring the curse of sin on the world, which is a constant reminder of how far reaching one person’s freedom might be. While it is tempting to ask God to let us keep our free will but limit the free will of others, we know that is not realistic. Young people must be reminded of this reality on a regular basis.

A word of caution is in order. While some of the pain in our lives comes from the sins of others, we must not allow that to become an excuse for developing a victim mentality. Second Timothy 1:7 says, “God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control” (ESV). Christ came so we could find the strength to overcome the troubles of this world. Churches need to help young people understand that while some pain is caused by the sins of others, we can overcome that pain through our faith in Christ. We do not have to live in fear. We may have been victims in the past, but through Christ, we can find victory over a victim mentality.


Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Pain and Free Will

In two earlier posts I mentioned how some pain in our lives is caused by our owns sins and some pain in our lives is caused by the sins of others. I want us to expand the discussion about those two ideas a little more in this post.

As I minister to young people, they often ask me why God gives us so much freedom to make such choices if we are just going to make choices that cause us pain. Young people want to know why God did not make us in such a way that we will always do what is right. This is a complicated question. 

The answer focuses on the free will God gives to people. I try to help young people understand that though God is indeed all powerful and could control our lives so we would be free from all pain, that choice would render us mere robots or puppets on a string that God was dangling around in the world. God loves us too much to give us such empty and meaningless lives. God has chosen to give us free will as an expression of His love for us. Unfortunately, our free will has been deeply tainted by our fall into sin. The apostle Paul confessed in Romans 7:15, “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate” (ESV).  This verse shows that even Paul struggled with his free will and its tendency toward sin. Free will has a price, for with control comes responsibility. Much of the time when we think we are exercising our free will, we are actually acting as slaves to our sin. This slavery to sin causes part of the pain we experience in our lives. Pain is often the natural consequence of our bad choices.

When we trust Christ as our Savior, we are freed from our slavery to sin. We receive the Holy Spirit, and He helps us make better choices and use our free will as God intended it. When we use our free will as God intended, it has positive results. When we use our free will in a way that God did not intend, the consequences are almost always painful. While we are free to make our own choices, we are not free to choose our own consequences. Many people prefer to make bad choices and then blame God for the results of those choices, but that is just not the way the real world works. Everyone wants God to fix their problems, but no one wants to join God in His eorts to do the fixing. God is always at work to bring hope to the hopeless and to change painful situations into joyful experiences. Hope and help are gifts from God, who is both powerful and loving. But we must respond to Him when He reaches out to us. We must open our hearts and minds to His working in our lives. If churches hope to help postmodern people come to faith in Christ, churches will work hard at expressing love to those who are bound up in sin while patiently showing a biblical way out of the pain sin causes.

If we think through the concept of free will completely, we have no choice but to conclude that though God is able to free us from all the pain of life, that would be inconsistent with His gift of free will. Therefore, one reason life can be painful is that even though God has given mankind the ability to make choices, mankind has not used that ability very well. We have used our free will to sin, and that sin has caused much of the pain in our lives. This may not be politically correct in our pluralistic culture, but it is morally, theologically, spiritually, and emotionally correct. We must help the next generation understand the connection between sin and pain.


Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Causes of Pain in Our Lives - Part Three


We have been discussing the causes of pain in our lives in the last few posts. We have established that some of our pain is caused by our own sins (read that article here). We have also established that part of our pain is causes by the sins of others (read that article here). But there is a third cause for pain that most of us do not think about.
 
The third cause of pain is Satan. God is not the only spiritual force at work in the world. Satan loves to cause pain. Satan is roaming about the world with his legions of demons looking for those he can destroy. First Peter 5:8 says, “Be sober! Be on the alert! Your adversary the Devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour” (HCSB). Satan is the one who kills people in car accidents and house fires. Satan is the one who causes one person to violate another person sexually. Satan is the one who delights in bringing cancer, disease, and pain into the world. We need to put the blame on Satan, where it belongs.

Consider Adolph Hitler. Though he was a relatively obscure politician with poor writing skills, he somehow managed to capture the attention of an entire nation. He then used that platform to promote unbelievable evil, resulting in the death of millions of people. How did he manage to convince a whole nation of intelligent, well-educated, and morally upright people to support so much evil?

Clearly there was a spiritual force behind him—but it was a spiritual force of evil. Many older people who look back on some of Hitler’s methods now recognize occult-type rituals and practices Hitler used to consolidate his power. The root of his power was beyond his personality; it was in Satan. We must never forget that, or else that terrible scenario could be repeated somewhere else in the world.

Hitler is not the only example of demonically inspired evil. I have read accounts of serial child molesters who described an evil power that overtook them when they would do terrible things to innocent children. Serial killers have similarly described a feeling of an overpowering force that compelled them to murder their innocent victims. Normal people do not engage in such aberrant behaviors.

When people do things that evil, there is likely a supernatural force behind their actions. The next generation needs to be taught how to do spiritual battle with Satan. Ephesians 6:12 teaches, “Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (NIV). Young people need to know how to recognize Satan’s eorts and overcome Satans power through faith in Christ. First John 4:4 says, “For He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world” (ESV). We can overcome Satan’s eorts, but we must be focused and intentional in our battle against him. This does not mean that Satan will never bother us again. Satan will continue to do evil because he is pure evil and does not know how to do anything but cause pain and hurt in the world. Christians, however, have the power to stand against Satan.
 
As we consider how we will deal with pain in our lives, let us not forget the spiritual power we have at our disposal as Christians. There is a supernatural power available to all Christians that can help us combat and overcome the pain in our lives that comes from Satan.

Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

Sunday, December 9, 2012

The Causes of Pain in Our Lives - Part Two


In my previous post I wrote about the first cause of pain in the world, which is our own sin. In this post, I want to addrress the second cause of pain in the world. While our own sin nature and our wrong choices are root causes for some pain and suering in our lives, the second cause for pain in the world is the sin of others. Sin has a ripple eect that causes pain to other people. Sadly, even when we trust Christ and He frees us from the grip of our sin, we are still subject to the poor choices others make who are still in slavery to their sin. As a result, we also experience pain when others make bad choices, and their consequences spill over into our lives. Sometimes the people hurt the most by sin have no direct connection to the individuals who actually commit the sin.

There are countless examples of the sin of others having huge impact on people with no direct connection to the sin. I still remember the horrifying pictures of Bhopal, India, on the news on December 3, 1984. I was a senior in high school at the time. Over a period of several days, nearly half a million people in Bhopal were exposed to the toxic gas Savin, which had leaked from a nearby pesticide plant. According to Earth Magazine, “Approximately 3,800 people died immediately. Thousands more died in the coming days. Those who survived recovered slowly or not at all.”  What caused this terrible leak? Workers at the factory claim that the plant’s “owners were known for their lax safety standards.” Having low standards was a way to save money and increase profits. The company denies this claim, but records indicate that “the safety systems that should have kicked in weren’t working properly.”  

This was one of the worst industrial accidents in history. Whether it was caused by the sin of greed or by the sin of laziness, either way, the sins of a few caused unbelievable pain to many people who had no direct connection to the people who sinned.

Part of learning to deal with the pain of this world is accepting that the mistake of others often spill over into our lives. None of us like that reality, but we must accept it as reality nonetheless. 

Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.

 

Saturday, December 8, 2012

The Causes of Pain in Our Lives - Part One

Based on my experience ministering to young adults, it has become clear that many of them blame God for the pain in their lives. Some of them do it outright and boldly, expressing great anger at God for letting bad stuff happen to good people. Others are more subtle, but they clearly question why a God of love would let bad things happen. God takes the blame for every painful moment and every painful action that has ever occurred in their young lives and in the world around them. If we church leaders want to reach the next generation, we are going to have to help young people deal with all this pain, along with the anger that emerges from it.

When I listen to young people talk about their pain, I try to remind them that there are three primary causes of pain in the world. This post will only focus on the first cause of pain in the world. Please make sure that you come back and read the next two posts so that you get the full picture of what I am trying to say about pain. The first cause of pain is our own sin. God has declared certain behaviors to be sinful. Because young people, who typically have a postmodern worldview, struggle with the concept of absolute truth, they will struggle to accept that there are certain behaviors that are sinful. Though postmodernists may struggle with the concept, that struggle does not negate the reality that certain actions are wrong. Though some people may feel God’s declarations about sin are arbitrary, that is not the case. God has declared certain actions to be sinful because of the great pain those actions cause either in our lives or in the lives of others.

Just as God has declared certain actions to be sinful, He has also declared certain attitudes and behaviors to be right. Right behavior brings more health and happiness and less pain into our lives. Wrong behavior steals our happiness and creates greater pain in our lives. Committed Christians accept these declarative absolutes. We read about them in the Bible and seldom question why they may be right or wrong. We just try to follow them the best we can. But postmodern people are not going to accept right and wrong without asking questions about why those actions are right or wrong. Churches often do not know how to respond when young adults question what the Bible says about sin. One way to respond to these questions is by showing the connection between sin and the pain that results from sin. We can help postmodern people realize that God is not a cosmic killjoy who is trying to keep us from having fun. God is a loving Father who is trying to keep us from hurting ourselves or others.

Here is one example of how our own sin impacts our lives in negative ways. I met Sahara shortly after she moved to our area. Though she was not religious, she heard about our church and thought it would be a great place to meet new friends. Sahara is quite outspoken in her opinions on many things, including her lifestyle choice of lesbianism. She is a leader in a pro-lesbian group that is sponsored by a local organization. She makes no secret of her feelings on that issue or a host of others.

Sahara’s strong opinions often result in her making many poor decisions, which have had an adverse effect on her relationships and her sense of well-being. Her choices have caused a great deal of pain in her life, but she is so confident that she is right that she seems incapable of changing course so her life can have less pain. Her pro-lesbian group told her this pain was caused by the narrow-mindedness of others. They told her that if her family and friends would just accept her lesbianism, then she would feel better about herself. Sahara has worked hard at pressuring those around her to accept her lifestyle choice. Many have done so, but she is still miserable, which demonstrates that others’ acceptance of her choices will not end her pain.

At one point Sahara’s many issues compounded themselves so much that she could barely function. One evening after church, she began to talk about why she so badly needed us to accept her sexuality. I had heard her repeatedly share her opinions on the matter, so I decided it was time to confront her about her choices. I explained, with as much love as I could, what the Bible says about her choices—not only about her lesbianism but about a number of other negative choices she regularly made. The conversation got very tense. She said she did not think she could come back to a church that did not accept her the way she was. I pointed out that she did not seem very happy the way she was, and it would be wrong of us to ignore her deep pain. I suggested that much of her pain was a result of something being wrong inside her, which the Bible identifies as sin.

Sahara got defensive and left angry. We did not see her at church for a couple of weeks. But then she came back. She declared that she was going to work on all of her problems and try Bible reading and prayer. After several more weeks, she declared herself a “half-Christian.” By that she meant that she now believed there was a God, but she was not quite ready to commit to Him. God is doing a deep work in Sahara’s life. God is showing her a way out of pain, but it requires her to make changes in many of her lifestyle choices.

The method I used with Sahara was to show her the connection between her poor life choices and the pain she was experiencing. By using this method, I was able to help her understand that I was not trying to judge her but to help her out of her pain. It has taken a long time, and the process is not yet finished, but I am confident that He who began a good work in Sahara will complete it when the time is right (Philippians 1:6).

Adapted from Dr. Dorsett’s book, Mission Possible: Reaching the Next Generation through the Small Church, published by CrossBooks, a division of Lifeway Christian Resources.